Thursday, September 21, 2006
Freeze.
Everyday, I would go home with a big smile plastered on my face.
Yes, indeed, my face is the picture of a perfectly happy person - contented and all that.
But that's big lie. I pretend and actually good at it.
The moment I lie on bed, that smile slowly diminishes - once, twice, thrice, over and over I think of things. Think of things that I wish I didn't do. Things I wish I didn't feel. People I shouldn't have gotten too involved with. People I should have avoided in the first place. The fear of being too overwhelmed with gestures and ending up as a loser in the end.
I'm not making sense. My sentences are badly constructed. Badly aligned. Badly organized.
Yes, scattered - that's how it is, just like how my thoughts and feelings are.I shouldn't melt.
Cause you're melting for another
Rorie at 8:54 AM
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
I know that I have a lot of updating to make but that probably won't happen yet, not now but soon. I promise.
I've been as busy as a bee these past weeks and I'm pretty sure that I have neglected a lot of things that I usually pay attention to. Blame: Comm 100 (Intro to MassComm), BC100 (Intro to radio and tv)and asthma attack.
However, what came along with a bit of neglecting is a bit of a new association (hello new friends and new experiences!). I've been busy, yes, but that doesn't mean I didn't have fun. I had - even LOADS.
I promise to share stories soon... I'll post pics too.
Rorie at 12:12 AM
Saturday, June 17, 2006
First Sem. Sophomore Year.
Environmental Science 1
I'm taking it under Dr. Benjamin de Jesus, who I think is a frustrated comedian. Baka magkabarkada sila ni Dr. Abastillas.Hehe.
Anthropology 10
The subject is pretty interesting and is actually a mix of different disciplines. Prof. Carlos Tatel is okay but has the tendency to be scattered.
PE 1
Ma'am Kate (Prof. Kate Layug) is so cool. I wish I was as fit as her!
Art Stud 1
Prof. Lucena didn't show up on the first day but he was recommended to me so I suppose he's good (and that he gives good grades too. tehee!)
BC100
The class is intimidating, I swear. But the fact that I have Ms. Pinky Aseron as my professor is, well, wow. She's the globe girl, the voice behind "The number cannot be reached. Please try again later." I was starstrucked when she demonstrated it in class.
Comm 100
Ma'am Evidente is sooooooo cool. I do not see boring class sessions coming.
MPs 179
Pagsusulat ng iskrip sa Pelikula. Wala akong masabi. Takot na takot na ako.
Pero astig ka Sir Aguila!
Rorie at 4:18 PM
Friday, June 09, 2006
My feet are terribly, terribly aching.
This is the result of not getting MST through CRS.
Rorie at 4:29 AM
Saturday, June 03, 2006
Dear CRS,
Binigo mo ako. Bakit isang GE lang? Dalawa ang hiningi ko, `diba? Nasaan na ang PE ko? Labis mo namang isinampal sa mukha ko na hindi na ako freshie.
Ganoon ba talaga dapat? Isang taon lamang ang ibinigay mo sa akin para ma-enjoy ka. Napakaikling panahon naman non. Pinatikim mo lang pala ako.
*toink!*
Sige na, fine, I'm exaggerating. Nagpapasalamat pa rin ako sayo kasi alam kong mas mapalad pa rin ako sa iba.
Nagrereklamo ngunit nagmamahal pa rin,
Rorie at 12:49 AM
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
Please CRS.
Final processing of subject assignments today.
I hope CRS gives me PE and two more GEs.
Ayoko talaga mag-manual!
Rorie at 11:23 PM
Monday, May 29, 2006
The Guilty Game
Dated outside your race?
** innocent
Singing in the shower?
** guilty
Spit in someone's Drink?
** innocent
Played with Barbies/Ken Dolls?
** guilty
Made someone cry?
** guilty
Opened your Christmas presents early?
** guilty
Lied to a friend?
** guilty
Seen "The Goonies" more than 10 times?
** innocent
used a Computer for more than 5 hours?
** guilty
Ran through the sprinklers naked?
** innocent
Ate food that fell on the floor?
** guilty
Went outside naked?
** innocent
Been on stage?
** guilty
Been on stage naked or close to it?
** innocent
Been in a parade?
** guilty
Been in a school play?
** guilty
Drank beer?
** guilty
Gotten detention?
** innocent
Been on a plane?
** innocent
Been on a cruise?
** innocent
Broken into a house?
** innocent
Gotten a tattoo?
** innocent
Gotten piercings?
** guilty
Gotten into a fist fight?
** innocent
Gotten into a shouting match?
** guilty
Swallowed sea/pool water?
** guilty
Spun yourself in circles to get dizzy on
purpose?
** guilty
Laughed so hard it hurt?
** guilty
Tripped on your own feet?
** guilty
Cried yourself to sleep?
** guilty
Cried in public?
** guilty
Thrown up in public?
** guilty
Lied to your parents?
** guilty
Skipped class?
** guiLty
Cried so hard you threw up?
** innocent
************
There. An excuse for being topic-less. It's fun anyway.
I tag Ate and Mae.
Rorie at 12:38 AM
Saturday, May 27, 2006
I don't know.
We're in the middle of having dinner when he dropped the bomb yesterday, "My dad's not sending me to school this sem and my mom just decided to take me with her. I might leave for California this December."
He's leaving and I don't know what to exactly feel.
******
Hazen, I'm so glad I was able to talk to you about things. Thanks a lot and I'll keep everything in mind.Miss you adventure-partner!
Rorie at 11:20 PM
Friday, May 26, 2006
ZZZZssle.
May hang over pa ko sa aking super unrealistic yet "I would want to dream about it again" dream...
Hay. Inspiration.
*******
Shouts out to one dazzling candy girl who's celebrating her birthday today.HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY CHES!
Rorie at 2:21 PM
Thursday, May 25, 2006
Unlucky.
"I'll give it to you tomorrow."
"I have one for you too. It's posted on my blog."
"Okay. I'll check it tomorrow.Just take care."
"You know what, you're easy to read."
"I don't get you. I don't understand why you have to reiterate what I've done to you."
"So that it seeps into your veins."
"You're making me suffer too much."
"Cause you made me suffer so much too."
"I know and I'm sorry. I am terribly sorry."
"If you're sorry, Show it."
"I am showing it."
"You're not. Because you're not even trying to understand why I speak about things inevitably. I cannot keep everything that I'm feeling bottled up inside. I have to release them."
"I know."
"You don't."
"I know. It's you who don't understand."
"I know I do."
"This is going nowhere. You're not trying to understand. Just take care and good bye."
"So it's you who really has to bid goodbye first? Shouldn't I be the one to drop that first?"
"Whatever. I just hope you find the right one for you, someone who would no longer shower you with problems. As for me, I wish I could find someone who would also accept everything about me that way you actually did."
"I'm not looking forward to someone new and I'm no longer interested. I've had enough and I need a break."
"Okay, if that's how you want it."
"Goodluck to you and that future girl then."
"Yes and I'll make sure that she'll never experience what you have experienced. I'll keep her away from my family just so I could hide her away from all the possible troubles she could get into. You're just unlucky."
"Wow. thank you very much."
****************
You're like Elliot Yamin, you pierce through the heart. But you're better, cause you tear it totally apart.
Rorie at 5:52 PM
You've got 1 New Message
Dear You,
It's having to fool myself that makes everyday hard for me.
Everyday, you would knock at our gate. I will smile at you, say "Oi!" then let you in but it's either I go ahead first or I get left behind. Once you're in, I'll offer you to sit on our not so comfortable sofa and I'll place myself somewhere far from you. I will talk to you in a very casual manner. I will sometimes throw you lots of jokes, insult you to death and dis you. You will often go home pissed off and worse, go home without even hearing something nice from me.
But there's one thing you don't know.. You don't know that everytime you go home exasperated, you leave me exasperated just as much.
You see, it's hard. It's hard when you knock at our gate and I couldn't do anything else but let you in and say "oi". It's hard when I keep myself from badly wanting to sit beside you. It's hard when I'm dying to ask you about how you feel or if you dreamt of me last night but couldn't.
It's hard to keep myself from doing all these things. But you (even I myself) can't blame me. What you've done in the past just stuck so hard in my head that I can no longer remove it. I'm trying to forget it but I just can't. However, I know, deep inside my heart that I still care that's why eventhough I once planned to do so, I didn't totally push you away and simply opened myself for friendship. Nevertheless, this friendship thing is something that I'm pretty sure we both find hard to adjust to.
But then you'll ask me, "If you find it hard then why do you still stick with it?"
For some reasons that I cannot perfectly explain, I have to. I have to because certain realizations have to be acquired by both of us.
If I have to fool myself over and over again until I get used to it, I will. I will if it is what will make things better.
Rorie at 12:13 AM
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Try this.
Try this if you're simply wasting away time infront of the computer and can't think of a fit topic to blog about.
What is your Icecream Flavour?Your Icecream Flavour is...
Cookies 'n Cream!
Smooth and creamy with a few rough bits mixed in, you are a real treat! You are probably very popular amongst your friends. Remember too much of a good thing is not always good! Don't lay it on too thick!
Find out at Go Quiz
Rorie at 1:41 AM
Sunday, May 21, 2006
Queen Spineless.
Two weeks ago, I've seen lots of fresh faces carrying "mabuhay ka iskolar ng bayan" envelopes around the campus. As they pass by me, I would exclaim "freshies" in my mind then flash a weird smile. At times, my blockmates and I would joke about it and say, "Pwede ng mangbully!". But then again, we're just joking. We know how it felt to be one and we know how overwhelming things about UPd can get. And somehow, I myself can't seem to have what it takes to show seniority to them because of two things: 1. I'm only a sophomore. I was a freshie like them just last year. 2. I'm just as scared as most of them.
Yes, I already experienced a year in U.P. but the one-year experience wasn't enough to take out all the cowardice in me. I actually still fret about the first day of classes. Especially now, that I'd already be having my major subjects. I'm afraid of feeling much more of loser. My summer experience in a classroom full of masscomm students made me really intimidated.
Having to apply for an organization also scares me. Managing time is something I was never good at. I also tend to be insecure at times and become really pessimistic. Being surrounded by very good people just makes me feel so incapable of excelling.
I feel really upset that I still haven't gained the confidence a BC student should have. But I don't plan to be upset about it for the rest of my life. So together, with those anxious-about to be shocked freshies, I welcome myself to another year of stay in UP and I hope that as I blog next year, I'd be confident enough to post that the 2 years of stay was able to remove the not-really-helping spinelessness in me.
Rorie at 9:27 AM
Thursday, April 20, 2006
blessed.
March 21 was the official last day of classes for the second semester. Infact, summer classes have already started last Monday. Yet, it is only now that I can finally say that I survived the 2nd semester of my freshie year. Now, that my grades are complete. (Actually, after waiting so long for Sir Falgui to release our grades.)
Now, I feel really blessed. so blessed. God never failed to answer my prayers. I'm utterly glad that I was able to achieve greater now than the previous sem.
Grabe talaga si LORD! Mahal na mahal nya ko!
Rorie at 12:21 AM
Monday, March 06, 2006
Hell Week
3 more weeks before the sem ends but it's no 'whew' or 'wow' time yet because hell weeks have come. I hate it when you seem to do very few things more than half of the sem then you'll be so loaded days before it ends.
It's amazing how I'm still able to blog despite the weight of school works, right? No, don't be amazed, I'm just one of those persons who still gets to be a bit irresponsible inspite of the demands.
Okay, so what's instore for Rorie this week and what is she faced to accomplish?
* Research for POLSCI 14 debate : Class approach vs. Elite Families Approach to explain Philippine Politics and Government
* Almost everyday debate meetings plus mock debate
* English 1 paper
* Watership Down
* Preparation for Student of the Day (still)
Hell week has come and 2 more will follow.
Hope Rorie survives.
-----------
While I'll be off for quite sometime, let me share with you some pictures taken last week.
Feb. 28, 2006. Mae, My sister and I after watching the UP Pep Squad Concert.
March 2, 2006. Very belated birthday celebration of Eden. (From l-r: Loren, Eden and I)
March 4, 2006. Bonding with Highschool friends.
Rorie at 8:54 PM
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
Let's go UP!
I just got home from the UP Pep Squad Concert and boy, was it a hit.
Before anything else, much love to my ate! I'm so proud of you sis. You definitely have been a shining star. (JPIA, her org, won second place in the contest held before the concert proper!) and of course to the Pep apps too. Way to go PUNKY!
Okay, moving on, the PEP SQUAD concert was really 'wow-worthy'. The university theater has been jampacked with people leaving Anna and I with hardly nothing to sit on. (But we got a seat anyway with a really good view) You see, i have never watched a dance concert before and I never thought it could be that fun.
Every single second was like a drop-jaw moment. They way they stretch their legs, the way they glide, jump, stand high on a pyramid as if they're on plain grounds were simply amazing. The creativity of their presentation was of course something to be taken into consideration. Their performances,which were filled with variations (ethnic, samba, madonna's like a virgin and material girl, cheerdance)really failed to bore us, the audience. The UP vs. UST spoof was the best part. They discussed what happened in the last UAAP cheerdance competition and i'm telling you, everybody was clapping and screaming especially when the UP representative said, "dapat sayo malunod... ay hindi pala, sana'y nga pala kayo sa baha." This doesn't signal school war, okay? It just goes to show how audacious UP students could get and how firm they stand for what they believe in.
But on second thought, I believe that the UP Pep Squad should have really won! (Peace Tigers!)
I believe so because their performances reflect the kind of commitment and dedication they put into every single move they make. Their attitude towards what they're doing is simply admirable.
To the UP Pep Squad, my 2 thumbs up! No Growling Tiger can Lord over!
Let's go UP! UP Fight!
Rorie at 12:00 AM
Monday, February 27, 2006
Random Thoughts.
Let me just say that I'm at "my thoughts are so scattered" moment. So just bear with me.
WHAT I HAVE IN MIND AT THE MOMENT:
* Our country's present situation is getting worse but it's not a hopeless case.
* What the Philippine Society needs is UNITY.
* No-class days are addicting.
* Photos may lie.
* It's never bad to wish for another pair of havaianas. (Pink one please!)
* College of Science canteen serves really good food.
* It's not bad to splurge money on books.
* A Walk to remember still never fails to make me cry.
* Nicholas Sparks is definitely one of the best around.
* It's better to cry over a moving novel than cry due to unmet expectations.
* You own your blog. You need not to follow any rules, theme whatsoever in your entries.
* We all have juvenile spots and it's fun to abuse them.
* Saying sorry isn't that hard.
* Getting irritated's hard to avoid.
* Having shattered ideas isn't solely the result of lack of sleep but as well a result of oversleep.
Okay, enough of non-sense. This is crap, I know. Heehee.
Rorie at 9:30 AM
Friday, February 24, 2006
A no-class day. Wow.
It sure is no big deal but it feels really nice to have even a day off from school works.
If there's class today, I'd be currently glued to my POLSCI notes, feeling nervous and all about being called Student of the day. I would probably be ranting again about how long our english instructor made us wait for him.
Anyway, anyway, I'm really just glad that there are no classes today. Well, I guess others aren't rejoicing just as much as I am. Thanks to the rally. Those rallyists, no matter how much some would deny, really makes such an impact. Impact on traffic and holidays as the most visible. But of course, there are things far beyond that.
This suddenly made me remember the relentless times I was asked to join ANAKBAYAN and LFS. If not for my parents, I could have given in. Our lesson in POLSCI made me realize what these people really are fighting for and if every filipino will have the chance to even have a slight knowledge about it, we would all be probably wishing for the same thing. This just goes to show how knowlege of a particular thing serves as a good investment. how knowledge of something makes us realize if something presently existing is what's proper or not.
Given what these activists have in mind, we'll all realize how oppressed we are and how much we're losing.
Rorie at 8:47 AM
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Kay Sarap mag-tagalog
Ano ba ang mas masakit? Manakawan ng cellphone o masiraan ng cellphone ngunit wala namang pera para maipagawa?Whatever Rorie.
Nakakainis. Nakakadepress. Nasira ang cellphone ko. Ubos na allowance ko.
Hindi pa naman ako nagdala ng wristwatch dahil sa labis na tiwala ko sa aking pulang telepono. Sira din ang alarm clock ko ngayon. Hindi ko rin makokontak ang nanay ko. Hindi naman yun marunong mag-internet. Hindi ko na rin makakatext si toot. Sayang yung load ko. Nakaunlimited pa naman yun. Buti na lang putol yung linya ko, hindi masyado nakakapanghinayang. Wala ng work out ang mga daliri ko ngayon.
Sana madaan ko sa orasyon ang sira nya. Syet talaga.
Nakakalungkot. Nakakaiyak.
Lintek rorie ang babaw! Kaya please lang pakisampal ako!
Rorie at 1:00 PM
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
To Drop or Not to Drop
Our Eng1 instructor is the ultimate headache.
Last friday, he threatened us with an "I think some of you should drop." I know I shouldn't be scared but it just seemed inevitable since we're clueless about our standing. He didn't give back our exam and there are rumors that he gives very low points in essays (and yes our exam was pure essay). He told us that he lost our bluebooks so he asked for us to consult with him this monday to check his recordbook in case we're interested about our class standing.
I went to him last Monday (last day for dropping) with Jerome and guess, what his greeting was? "I don't have your record book. If you want to drop, just give me your dropping slip."
Who the hell would drop if he/she hasn't even any idea of how he/she's doing in class? I guess, it's given that as long as you know that you're doing all that's required, you don't have to worry about anything. But the thing is, the exam definitely would affect our grades and we're darn CLUELESS about it.
He even explained on the first day of class that his grading system's very transparent. "You see class, you can compute it on your own. Find the average of your exam and your special project." Yeah right sir, like it's that easy! Give us our exams then!
The man could really teach.There's no doubt about that. He might even be one of the best around. His intellect is simply unquestionable but in terms of responsibility, i don't know why he seems to be neglectful.
We even think that he's a sadist. "Someone should suffer" is his favorite line and he claims to purposely schedule his exams during lantern parade, fair and other events wherein we would excitedly attend. "I want to steal the happiness of people", he says. How sweet?
I love the fact that I learn a lot from English Class but I hate the fact that my Eng1 class is a shamefully droppable one.
Rorie at 5:37 AM
Sunday, February 19, 2006
Hello? Are you there, child?
God seems to be contacting us bigtime these past days. Just recently, the stampede in Ultra and now, the killer landslide in Leyte.
Just as most would probably say, death seems to come in packs these days. And for this matter, our mindset is that there should be someone to be blamed. Either it be ABS-CBN for the way they organized things, the security for their wrong strategies, municipal officials for not informing people about DENR's warning, yaddah, yaddah, yaddah.
The thing is, why do we always have to pinpoint to someone? Why don't we just try looking at things in a wider scope? Let's just try asking ourselves...
What kind of society do we have today? Is it united? Are there more gaps than close ties? What kind of people have we become? Judgemental? Money-centered? Worshippers of material things? How about our relationship with God? When did we last pray? When did we last hear mass? Do we manage to identify mistakes that we've commited and ask God for His forgiveness?
God intended these things to happen not because He wanted people to suffer. He loves us and just won't let anything bad happen to us. We are His children and He'll protect us in anyway He could. But just like our parents, God gives us constant reminders and once in a while, reprimands us when we're no longer aware that we're doing the wrong things.
The stampede and the landslide are wake up calls. It's God talking to us, telling us that we already have forgotten our real purposes in this world. It is His reminding us of the things that we should be really doing. It's His call for our unity, call for us to finally settle with PEACE, call for us to realize that money isn't everything, call for us to talk to him and obey him and call for us to realize what LOVE really is.
God is reaching out to us. He's calling for us to change and be more close to HIM.
And the best thing we could do is, ANSWER HIS CALL.
